Friday, September 2, 2011


Still playing a waiting game for this month and NO I haven't miscarried again. I just wanted to shed some light on this tragic process. Not many women talk about their miscarriages when they have them. It is a very private hurt. Yes, your husband is upset too but you feel the pain in many more ways. I thought I would take the time and give some insight on miscarrying.

1. Like I said above...this is a VERY private hurt. Yes you tell others, people know and are sorry, but emotionally and physically it is heart wrenching and a deep down hurt like you have never experienced.

2. Your husband is so sad for you but is even more insecure on how to be there for you. If you have a good one like I do, he is understanding when you are tearful and holds your hand through the physical pain.

3. There is physical pain. With my first, I literally had contractions for nearly 10 hours. I went through a "mini labor", which is the way my doctor described it. It was so physically painful which just increased the emotional part of ten fold. When I went to the doctor a couple days after, he explained the process to me and I was blown away.

4. Sometimes you have to have surgery to remove the fetus. If your body does not do its job on its own, you have to have a procedure either at your OBGYN office or the hospital depending on how far along you are.

5. It is losing a child. I am not sure how many miscarriages I have had, I only know of the two that were "caught". I do know that I knew I was pregnant with a child both of those times and from the day you find out, you dream of what it will be like to hold that baby. No, I never got to meet those babies but I do believe that miscarriage is losing a child no matter how far along you were. 9 days or 9 months...all the same.

6. Nearly 25% of recognized pregnancies end in miscarriage. This does not count the ones that may be unknown at the time.

7. Miscarriage is an uncomfortable topic for our society. There is such a silence over miscarriage that it can in return greatly affect the mother. Not many know this. It is important to talk about these things, as there are SO many that experience it. Why are we so silent about it?

Talk about it. Share your experience. Those of us that have went through it NEED to hear that others are out there. Pray for those that have lost a baby. The pain lingers...and then lingers some more.

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